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Samstag, 12. Mai 2012, 12:20

Bisexuality (a report of a very special woman)

i know you have heard this before, so bear with me as i repeat what most of you may or may not know....
i come from a culture where bisexuality is legal, recognised and celebrated.
When a communtiy like mine can afford to recognise Bisexuality then
there is cause to celebrate because in my eyes a society more
patrachical than mine could hardly exist!
thinking of the patriachy makes me burn with anger, but let me get back
on track, before i wander into all those tradional and cultural
huddles. Where were we, ohhh yes, we were about to celebrate the
acceptance of bisexuality in my PATRIACHIAL community! Bring out the
champagne and cigars, no, actually make it beer and weed, if we want
to make this whole discussion as realitic as possible, being African i
can relate better to the latter !
Lets party get all drunk and high, lets celebrate BISEXUALITY!
Bisexuality. What does this term mean?
it be scentifically proven the homosexuals or hetrosexuals are born
that way? If not why does the whole world want to try and scientifically
prove or catergorise bisexuality?
mean it is as absurd as the Swiss immigration sending a letter to an
immigrant after 8 yrs of marriage and 12 years of living in Switzerland
asking the immigrant
1. why did you get divorced after 8 years of marriage?
2. Did you see this coming when you applied for citizenship?
3.what were the factors that lead to the divorce?
For those of you who don't see the similarity, i will try and point it out as best as i can.
This is why we celebrate bisexuality in my culture.
have a tradition that required every teenage girl to attend private
lessons at specifically choosen 'aunties' who taught them the art of
pleasing their future husbands. This mean't the 'aunt' would not only
teach the girl how to cook but also give her through lessons on how to
sexually please her man. The 'aunt ' would assume the role of the
husband to be, and performing the husband's part in the sexual act
during the lessons using a semi ripe sweet banana
(they are the smaller, shorter kind), well, for luck of a dildo and
also because the girls were still required to be virgins on their
wedding night. This way the young girl had her practical lessons but
remained a virgin.
to say, for a long time any young woman who didn't attend the school
(not that you had a choice) could never be married of. I grew up around
that time when this practice was still obligatory and i willingly took
part because i wanted to be the best possible wife any man could dream
of in a culture that believes the way to a man's heart is through his
stomach and his sexual desire.
So in this sence and ONLY in this sence my community almost worshipped bisexuality.
I say this because i need you to realise that bisexuality, before the 'schooling' period and after the 'schooling' period was NOT tolerated!!!
I shudder to think what would happen to any woman who dared openly
practice her bisexual desires after or before this time....
So in answer to question number two
*%*% ...... i didn't think see the divorce coming when i appiled for
citizenship just like i didn't think i would end up being bisexual when i
was sent of to the sexual education school either!

of you may argue telling me that was rather obvious, that i have my
cultural upbringing to blame for my bisexualtiy but then, how do you
explain all the other girls who had the same education and turned out
completely hetrosexual?
my humble opinion, i would say society doesn't want to accept
bisexuality because they don't know how to handle it, it doesn't fit
neatly in their structured catergorised ,well studied enviroment. In
saying so i also understand why they would rather not address or
confront it. They scorn me and tell me i just want to have both sides
of the pie, i understnad that too.
took a really long time for me to accept my attraction to women and to
be able to admit it to someone else. Till today, i choose very carefully
who i share this piece of information with because you can never
anticiapte anyone's reactions even if you think you know them well
those of you who think bisexuals are such nymphos who just want to have
a piece of any pie, you need to know that as a bisexual person, we go
through alot of turmoil wondering why we can't just be attracted to one
sex. I used to get embarrased and throughly confused when i got
attracted to women. Being the first girl in my family, i was mean't to
be an example to my sibblings and yet i was damaged, not normal, atleast
not sexually.Out of the fear of setting a bad example, i was single for
a very long time, ashamed of my feelings. I didn't dare confess my
thoughts to anyone for all my teenage life until in my early twenties i
finally met a married woman who introduced me to the idea of having a
partner who accepted you just the way you were. The idea of meeting
someone who would accept me the way i was gave me a new purpose in life.
I came ot of my dark corner, suddenly i stopped being the shy, unsure,
moody, and frustrated girl i was and blommed to become the witty, happy
go lucky almost always smiling woman i should have been.
my next entry i will answer the questions 1 and 3 of course i will
include what my thoughts on the similarities are ....dinner is calling

(Person known to the administrator)

Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 1 mal editiert, zuletzt von »Peter Christen« (12. Mai 2012, 12:26)


Dienstag, 18. Dezember 2012, 23:28

this is very touching , very moving. It makes thoughtful - there is no stop to learning what cultures can do to human beings- what human experiences can be. Though, the world will never stop to judge and ask the others: why? There will also be to hide or justify. why, why is it that difficult just to accept the others as they are? you see, i made the mistake, asked the stupid question "why" myself.

thank you for this contribution very special woman, this forum is enriching